Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, LinkedIn: These and other social networking sites have become extremely popular in our culture and are currently used by millions of people of all ages.
As a parent, perhaps you’ve struggled with some of the questions surrounding social media. How can I protect my child from cyberstalkers? At what age should a child be allowed to create a Facebook account? Does my child understand the difference between what is private and what should be shared publicly? Are the shallow exchanges of bits of information on these social sites replacing more intimate face-to-face encounters and ultimately harming our relationships with loved ones and friends?
Let’s explore some of these issues:
Cyberstalking
I have found that the following analogy is a helpful one for parents to use when talking to their children about the dangers of social media:
Imagine that you have been invited to a party. You enter the room where the party is held and you see groups of people engaged in a variety of conversations throughout the room. Some of the guests you know well, some not very well, and some not at all. You linger for a few moments, walking past the groups and stopping now and then to listen. Eventually, you join a group of people that you know well. Soon, you are engaged in conversation within that group and having a lovely time!
Now imagine that a stranger at the party approaches you. You have never met him or know him very little. Do you tell him your name? What about your address? Do you tell him that you are leaving on vacation for a week or that your parents will be out of the house tonight and you’ll be alone? Of course not! He’s a complete stranger to you and you have no idea what his intentions are.
Did your parents come with you to the party? Do they know where you are and who is talking to you? If not, how can they protect you from someone who might try to hurt you?
Many parents would never consider allowing a seven year old child to attend a party at a stranger’s house by themselves but they see nothing wrong with allowing them to have an account on Facebook or another social media site. Achild is equally at risk in the online world and he or she is in the real world.
Privacy Concerns
For the safety of your family, never post that you will be “gone for the evening” or “on vacation”. Women should be wary of posting that their husband is “away on a business trip” and children should never post that their parents are not at home! Even if you have been careful to only select people that you know and trust as friends, your posts may be accessible to more people than you realize. Facebook recently changed their privacy settings. This change resulted in many users unknowingly posting what they thought was private information to the Internet at large! Once you get back home, post all the great photos you took on your adventure and share those memories with your friends without putting yourself at risk.
Be wary of unverified applications and downloads on social media sites. Many of the quizzes and games are fun but they may be infected with a virus! Read the warnings that pop up before you download or open anything and if you have any question as to the content, DON’T open it!
Use caution when shopping online or signing into social networks. Cyber criminals have become very adept at mimicking the log-in page for many sites in an effort to fool you and capture your password. Always check for authentication on a site before logging in!
Don’t allow your online behavior to make you a target for cybercrime!
Social Media and Relationships
Parents are responsible not only for the physical well-being of their children but for their emotional health, as well. Many parents have concerns regarding the shallow nature of the interactions that take place in the social media realm. They wonder if these interactions will have a negative effect on their child’s ability to develop and maintain intimate relationships with others if used too frequently.
Add to this the fact that social media has proven to be an irresistible distraction for many children and teenagers; an addiction that has resulted in declining school and athletic performance. To further complicate the matter, a large percentage of the American population is now considered to be clinically obese. In light of these factors, it is imperative that we teach our children how to properly manage their time on the computer. Though the exact figure may vary from family to family, parents are encouraged to set a time limit each day that their children may engage in online activities. The rest of the child’s time should be spent building relationships with others in real world situations in order to ensure that their socialization skills develop to their full potential.
Interacting on social media sites is fun! We can catch up with old friends we haven’t spoken to in years, keep up with friends and family and even make new friends! I encourage every parent to embrace these tools of communication but to also use wisdom and caution when introducing their children to them.
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